Page 442 ~ Enter the darkness

For once.. I lay in the darkness..calm.. quiet.. breathing slow. Purposely holding each breath to restrain the beating of my heart. I cursed the cracks in the woodworking of the wagon. Pissed off that they allow my blanket of inky embrace to be marred with the streaks of white light. Moonlight. Firelight. My fists clentched and arms slithered up into the darkness.. shaking furiously with my muttered curses.. condemning each one for this intrusion. This... breaking of my peace. The gentle caress of nothingness. The sweet sweet silence of solitude... my solitude... interupted by those brazen zigzags. " How dare you! Vile and willfull little bolts of light... be gone! Leave me be! Go shine your glory on someone that wants you. Take with you.. those fingers of icy cold air. Do not brush against my ear.. do not attempt to caress my hair. You make me shiver against my will. You remind me of the warmth that I miss. A false touch... laden with humor... memoirs of comfort and peace. My memoirs.. the memoirs of love. " Yes.. it is that profound that I be given the peace of mind... the ability to undo the pressing down of my shoulders.. and get that weight off my back. These words rolled so freely from my lips.. mixing with the tainted air I drew into my lungs. For awhile.. I sat there.. barely breathing as if the Sky itself would punish me for defying Her and these small gifts I had renounced. There came no blast of air. No thunder.. no lightning. Nothing of a substancial recourse for my denial. I thought for a moment I had escaped Her wrath. Avoided it.. I had safely and sucessfully outwitted the great Sky! I grew smug and lay back.. resting my head to folded arms. But then.. I heard it. Soft.. in the distance.. growing louder. Until this wall of sound covered my wagon. I lay there.. flat on my back.. looking up at the canvas as a sheet of rain converged over me. Pitter.. pitter patter. Drip.. drip.. drip...drip. It was then.. that I knew.. She got one up on me. I wiped the droplets of rain from my forehead. Bloody hell.... I had left the fucking smoke hole open.