It was the turning point of the season. (Happy New Year Everyone) I waited at my fires for Ahn's.. alone. I seem to say that alot. When the moon's rose to the 20th Ahn... I was visited by Aunt. She leaned to kiss my cheek.. whispering words of encouragement and love. I told Her I was trying my best to hold on. When She sat with a small sigh... I knew She was up to something. Asked Her flat out.. I did. "What?!" She then proceeded to tell me that She would like to take the children to the back wagon's. Jerus had family there and so did She. I thought this over with little emotion on my part. Frankly I thought it would be good for the kids. I agreed.. perhaps to quickly.. and saw the look on Aunt's face. I had to add that... I thought it was important the children hear of their Father from more than just me. Nahir nodded. But... the twins.. Shi's boys.. would remain here. I did not have permission to let them go. Again.. Aunt nodded. Neither one of us saw things differently... yes they had different Father's but it was a fact we did not bring up to segregate them with. Fact remained... the twins were Shi's blood and I had no right to remove them... even if He wasnt around. I also told Her that She would need to get each child's permission to go with Her. Nahir smiled that small smile and nodded.. then told me that She already had. Wily.. Talia.. Starr.. even Mia and Sonny.. had all agreed.. rather eagerly to go. It was... an adventure in waiting. For a moment.. the Mother in me became angry that my children wanted to leave me. But I soon was reminded that I also needed time to find myself again. Aunt had a way of slipping those tid-bits of information to me that didnt hurt as bad than when someone else might say it.
So we would have a big dinner .. and in the morning... they would venture off. I made everyone's favorite's to eat. Using the meat Fonce brought the other day... fresh meat always tasted so good. I thought about Him alot over dinner. How.. everything He is going through and has been through... He still had time to think of me. He always did... that is what I respected Him for. Our talks at the fire were not only comforting but also informative.. and I was glad He was back.. happy He found His way home to His people and those that love Him.
With dinner over.. I kissed each child and told them I would rise with the Central Fire to see them off. Excitement spanned the area and they all ran off to make sure they had their things packed. Aunt offered to help me clean up... I shook my head and told Her to rest... She would have Her hands full starting tomorrow. Again She kissed my cheek and then headed off to sleep.
I cleaned up the plates and stored the leftover food. Now in need of a washing myself... I headed to the stream. It was late.. dark...and chilly. I would wash my hair there... instead of the warm baths.. something about the cold water that made my hair shine and feel so soft.. I could withstand the air just to do it. Stipping to the waist.. I unbraided that long.. thick rope of fire and then knelt over the rushing water and began to clean my hair. As I was almost done.. I felt the prickle of flesh rise to my back. I sat up sharply and looked around. I could see or hear no one.. but I could feel eyes on me. Grabbing a cloth.. I covered my hair.. and well.. my hands covered the rest of me. I shot up and out of there quickly. Be it Man or beast that gawked.. I would not stay to find out. Rushing up the wagon steps and diving into my furs.. I lay there for awhile just deep in thought. I would have to get some sleep.. ok.. more like rest. I needed to be up to see my children and Nahir off. The rest of the night dragged painfully slow.. but also.. morning came too quickly.
I was starting to regret letting my small Tribe go.
yet... I knew....
I had to.
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