Page 35 (6/1/2006) Guilty Pleasures

The wagon shook violently, the canvas was rolling in a wind that seemed to lap at it mercilessly. I could feel the wheels being picked up.. first only a few horts.. then more. Each time the bounce it took got bigger... longer and more forcefull. It made me wince anticipating the slamming back to the earth. Then it happened... the wagon lifted up high.. wobbled and I grabbed my ears and waited for the worst of the pummeling to the ground. 1 Ihn.. then 2... 4... 10.. nothing. Another Ehn passed before I removed my hands from my ears. The flapping of the canvas had stopped... the shaking.. the creaking of wood... nothing.. just an errie calmness. I stood slowly and looked around at the wagon in disarray. Straightening a few strands of hair back... I moved to the back flaps and feeling some sort of hesitation.. I threw them back and gasped. Clouds swirled around me in twisted ribbons of grey, black and white. Stepping out onto the platform.. I could only look down at what seemed to passang after passang of just air between me and the ground. As the wagon twisted in this vortex of gloom.. I looked out straight and low and behold rode Dashie on a trench shovel. She zoomed and zigged.. zagged and darted about the clouds like a tarn in the breeze. Her hair flew wildly in the air and I swear She had daggers for fingernails. She flew towards the wagon.. cackling like a old witch casting a spell and slammed into the wagon.. knocking it from it's embrace of wind. I dove back into the wagon as it started to desend from the winds...crawling onto the furs and curling up with what should surely be my doom when the vehicle crashed to the earth. Then it happened... not a crash.. but a bump.. followed by a bit of see-sawing and the wagon was still again. I got up and walked to the flaps again.. peeking out slowly to my surprise where I saw the tallest.. greenest grasses ever ! It was amazing !! I lept from the wagon and started to walk around the wagon when I heard chuckling. I turned every which way, but couldnt find the sources. Then I saw it... A bubble floating towards me.. growing bigger..bigger... until it loomed just before me. With a *Pop* the bubble burst.. and I had to laugh as standing before me was my Sister Tarra in the funniest of get-up's. Robes!! HA !! My Sister in robes... yes they were beautiful... and so was She. She walked towards me and smiled..speaking in such a funny voice. " My Child.. You have come a long long way down from the Skies. And you have brought us freedom from the Wicked Spex of the North. " Tarra pointed to a pair of legs that now stuck out from under the wagon. I looked back to Tarra with lifted brows. " Tarra.. what's with the robes, Sis? And where is everyone... I think I wanna go home." And I nodded a few times but Tarra seemed puzzled. "Home? And where is home?" She asked. "Duh.. the Tuchuk Plains, bonehead. How hard did I hit you the other night?" I heard several small chuckles close by and Tarra smiled. "Come out everyone and see the one that has freed you all from slavery!" Tarra said. The grasses came alive and out popped Shanay, Kota, Wily, Talia... pari..paki.. tanya.. sammie.. lissa.. and jesa. Ok, this is odd, I thought. Yet the chains and collars they bore dropped from their bodies and they started doing the most flamboyant dance Ive ever seen. They grabbed my arms and led me towards this opening in the grass where I noticed the beginning of a cobble stone walkway. They started singing.. " Follow the cobble stone road.. follow the cobble stone rode.. follow.. follow.. " ehhh, crap you get it. When they stopped singing.. Tarra floated over.. damn nice way to travel, I think. She said "Child.. In order to get back to this Tuchuk Plains you call home.. You must venture to the Wonderfull city of Turia and meet the great and powerfull Jerus. Only He can get you home." Damn if those people didnt start singing that annoying song again... "follow.. follow.. follow..." Ack !! I wanted to scream. Now I did wonder what in the hell was wrong with me for even listening to this.. but, I figured.. what the hell.. nothing to do right? So I started skipping.. errr no.. walking.. ahem, like a proud Tuchuk Woman down this road. It went on for Ahn's till I came to a field of wheat grass. A standard stuck in the ground caught my attention.. no, not cause it was the only tall thing there.. but damn, if it was Bo tacked to it. I ran over and poked Him.. He just wobbled like His legs were made out of.. you guessed it.. straw. I cut Him free and He crumpled to the ground... then popped up like a rocket. "Thank you for freeing me Wenchie" Bo said. Normally I woulda clocked Him for this.. but ehhh.. lets see what happened. "Ya welcome" I said. "Where are you off too?" Bo said... and I responded with a " Im off to see the Wonderful Warrior of Turia" Ew.. that was pathetic... but Bo nodded and said.. "Take me with you? I need a brain.. do you think He could help me?" Shit.. I laughed.. "Yeah surreeeeee.. the Wonderful Warrior of Turia can give you a brain.. let's go" "Ohh thank you... Im called ScareBo" He said And I groaned as Bo started skipping and dancing while singing that damn song !!!
Not long after we came upon the shack of what seemed to be a metal smith. Couldnt help but notice the figure of a Man dressed in full war garb. Leather everywhere and upon further inspection I could see the leather had grown so stiff that it restrained the Man from moving. He musta be caught in a sudden down poor and His leather shrunk up tight. I lifted the mask over His face and backed up so quickly I fell on my arse. ScareBo picked me up and I looked at the Man. ScareBo quickly grabbed a bucket of oil and started rubbing the leather till the Man could move. Finally He spoke "I am the TinKam.. thank you for freeing me from my confinement. How can I repay you?" "You could come with us to the Wonderful City of Turia, Im going there for a brain.. and She is going there to see the Great and Powerful Jerus so He could send Her home !!" TinKam asked ScareBo.. "Do you think the Wonderful Warrior of Turia would give me a heart?" "Ohhhh sure ! Why not !" said ScareBo. Yikes.. were these two serious? Kam and Bo now linked arms and started singing... I hate that song now.
As TinKam and ScareBo danced along the cobble stone road.. we came to a jungle. A loud roar was heard and out popped a Man with a larl pelt on His back. He growled and roared and barred His teeth with fingers curled like claws. I nearly died in hysterics as TinKam slapped the Man on the nose. He backed up with a whimper and cried. "Whatcha do that for.." sniffling the Man looked to ScareBo who spoke to Him. "We are going to the great city of Turia where Im going to get a brain.. and He is going to get a heart.. and She is going to go home!" When the larlfurred Man stood up.. I saw it was Shi and snickered. "Lemme guess.. You want courage" I said And the CowardlyShi nodded. "Can I go with you?" Shi said. And the three linked arms and started dancing around me. I wish I had a dagger right now. They started singing.. "Were off to see the Warrior.. the Wonderfull Warrior of Turia....." Skies.. help me
Soon we saw the end of the cobblestone road... and there was Turia.. glistening and gleaming in the light of the day. We all ran to the great doors of the city and entered the gates. I paused as a great kaiila rode towards me. Hells bells if it didnt change color several times as it watched it. A Man saw my expression and joked.. "Why Lady.. that's the kaiila of a different color !" What could I do but just nod and the three put me up on top of the kaiila and we rode to meet the Great and Powerful Jerus.
Within the surrounds of a great mountain.. smoke and mists billowed from the rocks.. we walked towards the alter set within. A booming voice called from the fog that swirled... "Who dares disturb the Great and powerful Jerus !!!" TinKam shook so hard His leathers creaked.. CowardlyShi chit Himself I think and ScareBo just stood there oggling the city girls as they past by. I stepped forward and called.. "Greetings Wonderful Warrior of Turia. I am Silken.. Silkenhawk and I wish to...." My words were cut off as the voice commanded once again.. "I know why your here girl. Kneel before the alter and I will see what I can do to ... errrr for you." There was an evil laugh and I said loudly.. "Bosk chit.. Im outta here !!!" I turned and took off running but was blocked by a large swarm of jit-monkeys. I turned in time to see my three friends being cut down by a large quiva..blood sprayed everywhere... fur.. leather.. straw... I started screaming.. and screaming.. and felt hands tighten on my shoulders.
I woke up.
Jerus was holding my arms... Bo, Kam and Shi were crouched around me... and Tarra was sitting beside me. I looked to them and whispered.... "I had the strangest dream.. You were there.. and you.. and you.. and you ohhh and you too !!" As I pointed to each in succession. Jerus just smiled and pushed the hair back from my face. I lay back down and one by one everyone left... I sighed and closed my eyes.
"There's no place like home......."