The calm before the storm is what most call it... And it's been way way too calm of late. I've felt this way before... many times.. and it wont be the last. I watch my Sister Tarra.. and as we so well see each other and hear each other without a word spoken.. we are in agreeance... something bad brews on the horizon. The wind whispers and shadows of those past have been abundant and frankly overwhelming at times... I do not envy my Sister for Her gift is more involved and detailed than mine. What I deal with cannot even be half of what She expierences. I can only hope that the other listen and consider just what is being told to them and not allow a terrible thing to drive a wedge into our Tribe. It is already here... among us.. waiting.. biding it's time until it can plunge a dagger into our hearts and destroy us. It plays within the minds of those that may have power... it toys with emotions and blinds with moments of joy and happiness... It lies and feeds false hopes.... but I know this demon well. I do not trust it... I do not welcome it... instead I stand ready and watching.. waiting.... for it will not have me.. or my family without a fight. The Elders past whisper quietly now... feeding and offering knowledge... Jerus hears them too.
My cloak is kept wrapped around me... for the chill I feel still shivers me to the core. It is in the darkness where I am most comfortable now. It is there.. I shall remain.. until that blackness that has covered our Tribe is lifted. I am tired... drained... and though Jerus heals slowly.. He still demands most of my time and attention. Only when with Him can I allow myself a few moments of peace and relax. I have yet to eat or drink properly... taking a few pieces of bread and a slice of meat with Jerus' dinner. Water seems to be the only fluid I can tolorate. My stomach churns constantly... and reminds me of the plague that has crept it's way into our bunch. It will die.. surely as I will fighting it. Whatever has taken possession of me... has a good hold... but I continue to battle.. even in sleep. The rage swelling within.. the anger... fustration.... how soon till it takes over and I amno longer in control? I cannot allow myself to be exposed to it... I must hide.... My cloak.. yes my cloak... hide within and allow nothing to escape.. and nothing to enter. The shadows are my Guardian's and within their embrace I can rest. No... I cannot snap... I cannot allow it to happen.... Marsuitus??....Papa????....... help me !
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment