Page 73 (1/1/2007) Over the river and through the plains.. to Grandpapa's place we go

Jerus heals well. Aside the normal post-surgery pains.. He is gaining strenght every Ahn. As much as I need to be with Him... I also find myself wanting time alone. Thus... my desision to go and visit my Papa Khilintyme. The children have been asking about Him and with Starr now old enough to travel... it made the trip bearable. I am almost 4 moons past with child now... though it really doesnt show. There is the slightest of bumps there... but Jerus hasnt been able to talk to anyone at the fires so... no one would bat a lash otherwise. Ive spent most of the past week packing for the children. Dakota and Shanay stayed here... Kota has lessons with Kam and Shanay is still seeing a certain young man... How could I pry them away from life on the plains. So... it was me.. Wily.. Talia and Starr. I left Jax here with the twins and took Jort and Seth with me. There was much to think about while on this trip... how things seems to be falling apart in our Tribe... the sway of minds to words and false pretenses... How so many voices could warn of the approaching troubles yet seem to fall on deaf ears... Did we not learn of letting people into our group based on snap judgements and what is painted to be seen rather than what is truely the intent? I hate to see what will become of us if this happens again. I believe people can change... yet I also believe that when once gained access to that which they drove forward to infiltrate... will resort back to past ways and create a havok that will drive a stake between us. I have alot to think about... and much to ask of those I call family. Even those I do not know well yet... I will seek counsil with them. Having taken the time to pen a few scrolls that I will leave on the platforms of certain Tribemates... I hope to speak with them and get their concerns and opinions and lead with an open mind rather than a chilled heart. I do not trust... I never will so easily again after my issues in the past... nor will I ignore the threats and warnings that come on the winds. I wonder how Jerus will deal with the change in me.... or if... He will even notice.
The night sky is beautiful.... to be free and in love on the plains... it is a good day to be alive.