Words... words brought our first encounter... the look into glowing eyes... the caress of our bodies together... the kiss of sweet lips to mine... the first I love you. The memories that will last to infinity... misspoken words took us away in a heated moment... and the only feelings left are from the memories of our love.. and always remembering the words.. the words not spoken.
He reached out to me when no one else had. He gently penetrated His way into my hollow.. rigid... empty world of introverted self-absorption. He gave me His love.. convinced me to trust Him.. open up to Him... believe we were going to be together forever. He took me in His arms... the scared... frigid girl. He held me safe and warm and told me how much He loved me. He wiped away my tears when emotion got the better of me and I cried. He stroked my hair.. held my face in His hands and wrapped His arms around me... protecting me from the world and from myself. The first time He kissed me... I cried. I was shaking so much I thought I was going to pass out. I thought I could never enjoy it again.. or imagine myself enjoying it but with Him... I did. He knew how to make me feel like the luckiest girl in the world. We had each other..... We had the world. Until it stopped. Suddenly like a brick wall was struck. It stopped. But somehow even that can't kill the chemistry between us. We are so dysfunctional... such an unlikely... ill-matched couple. We have nothing in common besides a physical connection so deep and unbreakable that no one understands it.... including us. It's inexplicable, unhealthy and utterly destructive. We love each other... understand each other so much... yet cannot make a relationship survive. I am the The 3rd party and I can't stand it. I am side saddled to the walls weve both built.. I can no longer break through His. I wish I knew just what was once in His heart. We both know we can't just be happy as friends because there's so much unfinished business between us. How do you ever stop loving a man who took you under His wing and tried to make you whole again? Who believed in you? My own fears held me back and my shame is now only my own to claim. How do you ever find a man to live up to that? Or do you not even try? Do you just accept that your heart has been taken and that's all there is to it? I failed again... I failed horribly again. I hurt myself again... I hurt the one I loved again. Its my fault. No one elses.
Skies... take me !!! Take me away so I can stop hurting and hurting everyone one I love !!! I dare you !!! Do you hear me????
I DARE YOU !!
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